Nature, laughter, lights, song, peace, love and dreams that came true

I was browsing through the pictures on my cell phone and realized they tell a story of our first six months in Nashville. It's a story of nature, laughter, lights, song, peace, love and dreams that came true. Enjoy.

My niece Bliss is born!

Grant broke his arm

Finally I'd like to give a shout-out to all the wonderful people we've met and come to love here. They are, in no particular order - Amanda, Jeff, Maggie, Paige, Julia, Gray, Missy, Michael, Haley, Merritt, Caleb, Josh, Breanna, Joe, Alex, Georgia, Elvis, Brian, Valerie, Maddie, Brian, Mariah, Brian, Rusty, Steve, Daniel, Lilly, Tigerlilly, Jenny, Austin, Grace, April, Patrick, Coach Greg, Jena, Eli, Anka, Coach Henry, Lynn, Yordanos, Jonathan, Bill, Florian, Shayna, Kim, Gwen, Chris, Markus, Nathan, Stephanie, Jacob, Marcus, Mimi, Will, Tim, Houston, Kim, Mr. Doty, Mr. Mayes, Ms. Ford, Ms. Hooper, Mr. McGuire, Ms. Ginter, Ms. Reddy, Ms. Strickland, Ms. Kurzrock, Dr. Pittman, Dr. Hughes, Ms. Gleason, Ms. Edwards, Ms. Angus, Ms. Black, Ms. White, Ms. Blake, Fong Chong, Craig, Taylor, Molly, Krissa, Mark, Bliss, Delaney, Landon, Libby, Danny, Andrea, Alexus, Marcia, Tim, Mave, Cheryl, Mike, Trey, Walker, Brooxs, Jacqui, James, Elizabeth, Leo, Alice, Wallace, Mary, Eden, Kate, Lindsay, Lisa, Michaela, Kori, Charlene, Jerry, Craig, Jeanette, Britney, Bailey, Renee, David, Xavier, Jeremiah, Cora, Nora, Shemuel, Kai, John, Amy, Mark, Harry Potter, Anissa, Hong, Grace, Carter, Mason, Doug, Susan, Jamey, Angie, Tina, Hope, Bruce, Thomas, Nancy, Miles, Lise, Blake, Sarah, Dominic, Laura, Jeff, Mida, Joe, Julia, Jim, Marcina, Craig, Will, Leslie, Kennedy, Laura, Elizabeth, Emily, Claire, Vicki, John, Lucas, Alex, Mandy, Patricia, and oh my goodness look at how many of you there are, you wonderful people, and I'm sure I'm forgetting many others. This city has been so good to us. You all have been so good to us. Thank you! We love you.

Another Tender Tennessee Christmas

Well technically for us it's the first one but still, we are totally enjoying this Christmas in Nashville.

I would have eventually forgiven you for losing half our sheep

We've been going to The Vine Street Church in Nashville lately and they have a wonderfully active kids' choir program.

Which one of my kids do you think bonded with the choir director right away? And then agreed to be part of the Christmas play, even though we got to the church just two weeks before the performance whereas the other kids had been rehearsing for weeks? And willingly stood in front of the audience tonight, singing loudly and proudly? With lots of adorable head bobbing?

No, not this one.

It was this one.

Audrey was in the audience and Grant was on stage as a shepherd. At first he told me he had been cast as a cowboy, and then no, maybe it was German shepherd. We finally figured it out. (His English has improved by leaps and bounds but some words still throw him for a loop.)

When he knew the words he sang them clearly. When he didn't know them he faked it so well, only his mother would know the difference.

You guys know me, I was in the audience crying, of course. Partly because my boy was such a charming little shepherd. He is exactly the type of boy, curious and brave, who would have followed a star to see the Baby Jesus on that night 2011 years ago.

There's also a good chance that on the way to see the Messiah he would have left his sheep on a hillside somewhere and the next morning we would have spent hours wandering in the wet grass trying to round them back up again, with Grant in the background reminding us again and again that it was AN ACCIDENT, AN ACCIDENT! Oh dear, these 8-year-old boys and their accidents. It is almost more than a mother can bear sometimes.

So back to me crying.

It was partly because he was such a convincing and sweet little shepherd. And partly because I could not BELIEVE how well he learned those songs in just two short weeks. This is a kid who could hardly say a complete sentence in English five months ago when we arrived here from Beijing. And here he was singing so clearly, "Will you be ready for the light, ready for the light to shine upon you?"

And partly because he had dared to do this thing. Even the dramatic and daring Audrey had shied away from this performance. But there was Grant, standing on the "boomer" (riser) singing and I was in the audience crying. I put my hand on my cheek, hoping it would look like I was lost in thought or admiration and not simply bawling. I faked it pretty well, I think. At least, well enough that only my son could tell the difference.

I am ready, Grant. I'm ready for the light to shine upon me.

And I would have eventually forgiven you for losing half our sheep.

Newest Member of the Gao Family

Dear customers of the Downtown Diner, I give you the newest member of the Gao Family: Cooper Ziggy Gao.

He's a shih tzu. Isn't he adorable? Audrey tells me at least two times every hour, "I just love Cooper." Or she comes to me with an excited report that goes something like this:

"Cooper came over to me and he went like this. And then I went like this. And then he went like thiiiisssss! Isn't he just so cute?! I just love Cooper!"

Grant made an astute observation - he looks like "one of those dogs you see on a girl's binder."

Doesn't he though?




Let me tell you though, the shih tzus, they are hard to house-train. Cooper got me up five times during the night last night. Two times he peed. The other three times, he and I stood there in the freezing cold under the stars, shivering and looking at each other.

I might have said some curse words.

And this is probably not a shih tzu thing but a normal puppy thing - he eats EVERYTHING! Just now I pulled Grant's Chinese textbook out of his mouth. A minute ago he was nibbling on a soccer ball. Sometimes he even snacks on rocks.

Welcome to the family Super Cooper!

Henry the Dead Rat

There is a dead rat at the end of the driveway of our new house. It is so badly decomposed that I thought it was a big brown leaf but Audrey looked at it one day and saw what it really was.

Much screaming ensued, I can assure you. From her dramatic performance you would have thought she had uncovered a mass grave in our front yard.

Anyway no one has moved the carcass so it just sits there. One day when we made a family trip to the mailbox (I don't know why the kids have to go with me to check the mail but they do, every time) Audrey took a moment to visit with the dead rat.

"Let's name him," she suggested. "Mr. Henry. His name should be Mr. Henry."

I was engrossed in a packet of coupons and Grant just shrugged. Audrey continued.

"Mr. Henry, we want to say something to you. We want to say that we're so sorry."

Grant was jolted from ambivalence - his reaction was lightning-fast and assured. He kicked the gravel at Mr. Henry and Audrey. "Sorry?! What am I sorry for? I didn't do anything to him? I'm not sorry for anything!"

You have to understand that Grant is busy enough taking responsibility for the crimes that he really did commit. He has no time to accept blame for things he didn't do.

Audrey kept her eyes on Mr. Henry, unfazed by the rocky disturbance her brother was causing. "Mr. Henry, we are sorry. We're sorry that..." Her eyes were cast downward but I could see that she was searching the ground for some way to complete the sentence she had just started. It's a poor dead rat. Surely there is something we should be sorry about here...

"We're sorry that, that you died."

Grant scoffed. I put a coupon for Disney on Ice (4 for $44) under my arm and threw the rest of them in the recycling bin. Audrey took one last look at Mr. Henry and started a solemn retreat back to the house.

And sadly, no one made any attempt to dispose of Mr. Henry.

No, that ring is not "hoochie"

Yesterday Grant asked me to come to his school to have lunch with him. Fortunately his school not only allows this but encourages it so I gladly said yes.

This morning I asked him if he had any ideas of what I should wear to his school. "Anything is okay, just not anything too hoochie, okay?"

Pardon me? When did he even learn the word "hoochie"? And have I been known to wear "hoochie" clothes?

I tried to go for a demure yet casual look for our lunch date but I couldn't resist wearing my green flower ring. Does this count as hoochie?

I think not.

I had forgotten how wonderful the bulletin boards are at elementary school. As I waited for Grant outside the cafeteria I taught myself the sign language words for "P.E." and "read" and "backpack".

Then Grant came around the corner and saw me, and he looked so excited. It was the sweetest thing in the world. He held my hand but didn't talk to me since talking isn't allowed in the hallway.

Maybe that explains the sign language bulletin boards.

Then he showed me how to get food in the cafeteria and I was reminded of the day 15 years ago when his father did the same thing, in a different cafeteria, one that was halfway around the world at Chiba University in Japan. That was our first encounter, and the rest is history.

Sunrise, sunset.

I had a ball talking with Grant's classmates during lunch. This one little girl was so cute. Here's a recap of our conversation:

"Did you know they sell cookies for a quarter up there? You can get four for a dollar!"
"That's very impressive math, Madeline. And you're right. Four quarters is a dollar."

Moments later.
"You know, you could go up there and buy four cookies right now."
"I guess I could, Madeline, but I could never eat that many cookies."
"You could give them to us!"
"That's a great idea Madeline!"

And me, being the pushover that I am, I bought four cookies and gave them to Grant's classmates.

After lunch Grant's teacher let me hang around for recess, which Grant calls "Reese's". He's confused as to why they don't hand out peanut butter cups at Reese's break.

Then after Reese's the class lined up and Grant asked me for a hug and a kiss goodbye. This is huge, folks. When I picked him up at his school in China he completely ignored me. He said, "If people see me hugging an English woman they'll think I'm English."

News flash #1: I'm not English.
News flash #2: Even if you don't hug me, people can tell you're half white.

But after a few weeks in the U.S. he is not only not ashamed of me, he's proud of me. I guess he sees that in a different context, I'm not a bumbling, lost fool. Instead I'm smart and capable. And I have some cool rings.

Of course we all know I've always been smart and capable rather than bumbling and lost, but you have to see it from the perspective of an 8-year-old.

All I can say is thank God for different contexts. And for 25¢ cookies. And for schools that encourage parents to come to school for lunch.

And most of all, thank God for 8-year-old boys.

This girl walks into a shoe store and

We have wi-fi at the house now and it is so dang fast and I can access ANY site I want! I feel so free after years of trying to get around the internet censors in China. And the censorship was getting heavier and heavier as time went by, which always left me with this ominous feeling that one day I might wake up and be able to access chinadaily.com.cn and nothing else...

Anyhoo, have you all been looking at the green stuff? I hope so.

Since segues don't appear to be my strong suit this morning ("anyhoo" is not a segue, I admit that) I will make no attempt to give you one now. I'll just go straight to a great Nashville story for you.

My BFF Pat came to Nashville to help us get settled in and we wanted to celebrate with a glass of wine. The kitchen was completely bare so I went out in search of a liquor store where I could get a bottle of wine, some wine glasses and a cork screw.

The name of the one I found was so perfect for the Deep South. "Mr. Whiskers Liquor Store".

I quickly picked a Yellowtail Chardonnay from a collection of wines so impressive you'd hardly believe it belonged to a man named after his mustache. But I could not find the wine glasses and cork screws. I walked through the whole shop twice and finally gave up.

As I was checking out I asked the guy at the register where the corkscrews were.

"We can't sell cork screws here. Tennessee law," he said.

"You can't sell cork screws?"

"Tennessee law," he echoed.

I must have looked really pitiful at that point. I was after all wondering if I would be able to swing the bottle of wine at the side of the house and open it without shattering the whole thing.

He whispered to me, "You can buy a corkscrew at the shoe store next door."

"Seriously?" I asked. "You can't sell me a corkscrew but the SHOE STORE can?"

"Tennessee law."

By then I was actually enjoying the thought of opening the bottle of wine with some unconventional method but I wondered if he was kidding about the shoe store so I decided to find out.

The shoe store next door wasn't one of those crappy shoe stores that sell last year's shoes at next year's prices. It was a serious operation. One of those orthotic places that make molds of your feet and do heat-sensitive impressions and stuff.

"Can I help you?" asked a friendly, white-haired lady.

"The guy at Mr. Whiskers told me I could buy a corkscrew here?"

"Yes, let me finish with this customer and I'll get one for you," she said.

"Oh, I don't really want one. I just wanted to know if you really sell them," I answered and then walked out.

So let's re-cap here. In Tennessee wine is sold in liquor stores and corkscrews are sold in shoe stores.

Shoes, it seems, can be sold in shoe stores.

Everyone got that?

Tennessee law.

Take Time to Look at the Green Stuff

We arrived in Nashville on July 18 and we're slowly settling in to our new house. Every day is chaotic and fun right now - I'm drinking wine out of paper cups and mixing chicken salad in a soup pot and we're sleeping on a mattress on the floor but we have everything we need.

There are so many stories I want to tell you but for now I'll share the one on the top of my mind -

On the drive from Birmingham to Nashville Grant stared out the window for several minutes and then told me, "I've looked at green stuff so long now, my eyes can see further. When you look at trees and grass for a long time I know it makes your eyes gooder."

More later, once we get wi-fi established in our house. For now, don't forget to look at the green stuff.

Oh, and Reba McEntire is going to be my neighbor

People have been asking me the same questions about our upcoming trip to Nashville so I decided to simplify things for all of us and post an FAQ.

(Do normal people post FAQs about their personal life? Someone tell me they do.)

1. Why are you going to Nashville?
The kids' English is falling behind their same-age peers in the U.S. and I want them to catch up right now. There's a certain window of opportunity for learning a language like a native speaker and I don't want that window to close before I realize it. So the main goal is to get their written and spoken English back up to their age level.

At the same time I really need some time back in my home country, close to my family. I do love China and my friends and family here but after six years, it's time for me to get back home for a while.

2. How long will you stay?
At least a year. Buddy and I will an assessment after six months and see how everyone is doing academically, socially, health-wise, etc. Then we'll decide whether we'll move back to China in 2012 or if we'll stay in the U.S. longer.

And wow did I just put "academically" ahead of "health-wise"? I did, didn't I? That is just not right.

3. Why Nashville? Aren't you from Alabama?
Yes, I am from Tuscaloosa and my parents are still there but we picked Nashville because it's a very open-minded and vibrant place. Nashville is a city with soul.

Plus my baby sister Amanda lives there and she and her husband Jeff are expecting their baby Bliss in September.

(When your baby sister has a baby do you have to stop calling her that?)

4. Where will the kids go to school?
Nashville public schools. Julia Green Elementary School for Grant and J.T. Moore Middle School for Audrey. We're going to live right across the street from Amanda in a 2BR/1BA duplex.

Yes, one bathroom. God help us. I hope Reba doesn't mind if Grant occasionally pees in the bushes in the backyard. Maybe she will write a country music song about him.

5. When do you leave?
July 14.

6. Have you started packing yet?
Yes. Grant packed the first suitcase over the weekend. He used our biggest suitcase and filled it with Nerf guns.

So we're set, basically.

7. Are the kids excited?
Yes, totally. They can't wait to see what American schools are like. And they love cheese grits and Taylor Swift.

8. Will you miss us here in China?
Yes, absolutely. I love you guys. We will be back, I promise.

Parking in China: The Joke I Do Not Get

When you were little did you ever have those times when everyone else was laughing at a joke and you didn't get it but you pretended like you did?

It happened to me all the time. And that's how parking is for me in China. I think we're all just parking wherever we can find a space but apparently there is some rhyme and reason to the whole thing that I DO NOT GET.

For example today I drove to the subway station and parked on a side road. There was another car parked right in front of me so I thought it was okay to park there.

But alas, 2 hours later, Buddy sent me this picture.


It's a parking citation.

But seriously folks, I don't get it. I think we're all just parking wherever we can find a space. Aren't we? (I took these pictures of parked cars on the way home today. These are very typical parking jobs.)











So why did I get a citation for parking like this?


China, I just don't get it.